You've reached the end of the in.ternet

Yup, I have. I was just obsessively googling (what else is a girl supposed to do during the 2ww) and googled my own blog. I've come full circle, there's nothing else out there for me. Funny thing is, I certainly don't have the answer!

I love this quiet before the holidays. We slept in, cleaned a little, and ran some errands (BAD idea to wait until today to go to the grocery store). We're hosting Christmas Eve dinner...but I'm taking the slacker route and doing a ham.

Had a really weird experience last night. Went out with a bunch of girlfriends, some of whom have moved away and are back in town for the holiday. After dinner we were at someones apartment and they all started talking about the bcp. I felt so out of the conversation. I haven't taken bcp in 2.5 years. Apparently there are new ones out there! I wanted to shake this one girl who says even with her pill she hasn't gotten a period in 4 months....but her dr isn't worried! I wish I knew her better, so I could just tell her to be more proactive.

And since I finally decorated....here's a few pics!

Our tree-I realized we're missing a box of stuff, so it's a little sparse

The stockings are hung on the bookcase with care. The little one in the middle is kitty's ;)

And speaking of...here's how he 'helped' decorate ;)

Get out the map

Every 2ww I analyze (hmmmm....over-analyze) my boobs looking for those tell-tale blue veins. I stand in my bathroom looking at myself in all sorts of light and usually manage to convince myself that I see one. Then I rest happily knowing that for sure, I'm pregnant. (yes, I realize that this is probably more information than anyone ever wanted to know about me). Then this morning, I am about to get in the shower and I actually jumped back in surprise. Holy crap, my boobs have an actual roadmap of nasty blue veins across them....I look disgusting! I've never seen anything like it. Yet another sign to make me think I might have a shred of a chance.

8dpiui and other than RandMcN.ally scattered across my chest, nothing else is going on. I'm going to try to wait until Sunday to test. That'll be 11 days. I want to make sure that darn trigger is out. Plus, I usually only have a 12-13 day LP so Sunday wouldn't really be that early. But, like I said, I'm going to try to wait. I make no promises.

Mel has a great post on why Christmas just sucks sometimes. I hate that I don't enjoy the holidays as much as I used to. And I know my family resents that I spend more time with the in laws since they don't celebrate Christmas. Even being around my niece for Hanukkah is easier than my cousin's kids at Christmas, not sure why. I've stopped sending out cards...because I don't want to get them back in return. Last year I got 2 cards where people announced their pregnancy. Talk about being blindsided. Since I can't hibernate, I've just stopped getting the mail. Mr H still does every few days but the catalogs go straight into the recycling bin, they never even make it into the house. Not sure what I'll do with the cards and newsletters when they inevitably start pouring in, I guess save them for a good day...I do have them occasionally.