Sunday, June 14, 2009

Happy sad

I'm happy sad tonight. Mr H does not understand how one can be happy sad but I know all you out there will. My brother and sister in law, whom I love dearly, just announced that she's pregnant. I am ecstatic for them. It was their first month trying. They got to do the cute announcements to the family via picture frames and teddy bears. I had all those plans once too. Instead I got to email out beta numbers to a select group of people. Like I said, I am beyond happy for them. I love them both, I'm excited for Sweetness to have a cousin from the normal side of the family (Mr H's bro and SIL are a piece of work). But I'm reminded of just how much IF took from us. Of course, I've got Sweetness, and I couldn't imagine any other baby. Right now I'm just surrounded by people who have been able to plan their families down to the month. It boggles my mind. So it makes me happy sad. I've been trying to go to sleep for about an hour and half already but I keep going over this in my head. Now that it's out, hopefully I'll be too...

12 comments:

battynurse said...

Oh yeah. I get it. All the things you've spent time imagining just never seem to turn out the way you thought even though it seems that it all turns out just right for others. I've often wondered if those who seem like everything turns out just perfect really feel lucky or if they too feel like things didn't or don't turn out like they planned or hoped.

Heather said...

I hate how one piece of news can make you feel such strong conflicting feelings.

My sister got pregnant the first month she stopped her birth control. I felt the same way. For me, it helped to focus on the selfishness of the situation - I got to be an Aunt again.

Bean said...

Oh, I get it! Heck, I could write a book about it!!!

Jennifer said...

My brother just announced they're having their 4th (an oops) and my bff got preggo her 1st month trying. I totally hear ya, but like you, I'm almost thankful for my struggles (sounds kinda wierd, I know), becuase I now have my baby boy, who I cannot ever imagine a life without!!!

K77 said...

I just get the sadness. I'm still far too hurt and bitter to have the happiness thing happening.

chicklet said...

I get it. A girl at work just confided in me that she's 9 weeks and it happened when she went off the pill (without "trying"), and while I love her and am happy for her, it still depressed me a bit - that we never got any of that.

Julia said...

I totally get it. Even though I am so run down physically I so don't want to be pregnant now that the thought makes me anxious, I get it.

JJ said...

Yup, yup, and yup...I understand. Its definitely a happy sad--and I knew exactly what you meant as I read it. Im glad we can be SO thankful for what we have-because of the journey we took to get where we are...

Coming2Terms said...

Bean: I did write a book about it ;-)

Totally understand what you're feeling this way.

Sticky Bun said...

I totally hear you. There is no way to completely erase those feelings, and being reminded that some people just decide and it happens is a cruel reminder.

Thanks for checking in. It's great to hear from you and I really appreciate the support because I know you get it. :-)

In and Out of Luck said...

Oh, you had me at "their first month trying."

Thank you for the comment you left on my blog. I don't know, it was like a perfect comment for some reason.

Katie said...

Thanks for your comment on my blog. It means a lot to get support from people I've never met when I don't get any from my immediate family. It sounds like you totally "get" the brother and SIL PG thing too. I'm sorry that it brings us both conflicting feelings.